If Wanting Him is Wrong...(I Don't Want to be Right)

The event planning business that Alexis had struggled so diligently to build was recuperating quite nicely from the sudden tailspin it went in a few months ago. All of the publicity that was circulating in the atmosphere concerning socialite Debra Kay Charmaine, and the accusation and subsequent arrest of the young bride-to-be impacted Alexis's business in both a negative and a positive way. Alexis herself had reeled from the shock of being a witness for the prosecution against Debra Kay, and she had to actually close up shop for a few days until she could regain her bearings. After all, it isn't everyday that a person gets a call from one of her clients just hours before the nuptials confessing that she had just killed her groom.

After Alexis had recovered sufficiently to re-open the doors to her business, she discovered much to her delight, that her brief notoriety had made others seek her out. Her best friend Bonnie had laughingly told her that it was nothing like free publicity! One of her longtime friends Cassidy Willoughby had also become her 'unofficial' assistant. Callie (aka 'Delicious Diva') Bennett had been hired when Alexis opened the shop, and she had proven to be invaluable the entire time; even during the shop's temporary shut down. She was an enthusiastic, smart and very capable young woman.

Callie reminded Alexis of herself when she was that age. Fresh-faced, eager to learn, eager to work and determined to succeed. But recently with the influx of new clients, Alexis and her business manager had taken a second look, and decided it was a smart move to bring in another associate. Cassidy had found herself with a lot of "empty nest " time on her hands, so she volunteered and Alexis accepted her friend's gracious offer. Besides with a daughter in her freshman year of college, the extra money she'd be making would come in handy.

That was not all of the recent happenings where Alexis was concerned. A few weeks ago, she had received a Facebook friend request an a chat message from an old co-worker. It had been ages since they had worked together, and frankly she was surprised he even remembered her, when she got the friend request.  So when he started the chat sessions with her, they were nothing out of the ordinary in the beginning.

Then he became bolder and bolder as the sessions increased. He didn't miss a chance for contacting her whenever they happened to be online at the same time. After the first week , he asked for her phone number so that they could leave Facebook and begin texting each other. She agreed and the madness began.

His aggressiveness was both flattering and somewhat intimidating at the same time. His language was more than colorful when he described the things he wanted to do her. He also went into explicit detail about what he wanted from her as well. She couldn't be sure if he was really excited about her, or if he was simply a freak. Either way, she could not muster up the slightest bit of enthusiasm when it came to him, but she decided that she would play along just for fun. Little did she know that very soon the tables would turn on her!

His questions about her sex life were relentless, and then he started asking her to send photos of herself. All of this was coming from a married man who was at home at night with his wife in the same house. Alexis had to finally admit to herself that she was starting to get more than a little turned on. She was considering his proposal that they hook up. With each text conversation,she was being pulled further and further into this web of sexual desire and she felt herself sinking into a place where she'd swore never to return.

It had taken her years to climb out of that rat hole her past actions had put her in,and she had taken a personal vow not to ever fall into that pit again. The pure hell of living with regret, self recriminations and guilt had taken a huge toll on her in the past. When she got free...she cut all ties to that life.

Now here was this man who had awakened a dormant passion in her; a desire to be fulfilled as a woman again. She was seriously considering his invitation to join him in a sexual relationship. He had stated to her after they'd been communicating for about a month (nearly every single night for a couple of hours each) that he 'could not afford to get involved in an ongoing affair, but he definitely wanted to establish a purely physical hook up every now and then) and knowing this going in she was  still thinking about doing it.

How pathetic was she? Had the longing to be close to a man and be consumed by him taken over her rational thought?  What was she thinking; rather not thinking about? These and more questions plagued her yet they did not completely dissuade her from the idea. Rationale and conscience had not yet assuaged her. The score was now skewed in favor of satisfaction and she knew she was in over her head.

She had been alone for so very long! Her last relationship with Frank had not ended well and had left her brokenhearted and jaded. Oh sure...she had dated a few men since during the past two years, but never seriously and never had any of them gotten her so turned on. This new man (her very own Mr.X) was inside her head and was taking up all of the space previously used for common sense thinking and actions.

She wanted to be held. She wanted to be caressed and loved and share that intimacy with a man again. It had been too long, and she wanted it badly. And she wanted this man. She wanted him to take her and to possess her and make her his for whatever time they had together.

What was she to do? And was she truly prepared to pay the full price, counting the cost of this desire? When she paid, there would be no refunds and no turning back. It would have to be all...or nothing.

Which Are You?

This is shared information about a detailed description of how a young woman learned a valuable life lesson from her Mother, at a very critical time in her life. I discovered it a few days ago, and liked it so much I am hoping my readers will also. Read on...

A young woman went to her Mother and told her about how hard things were for her and how tough her life was at that time. She did not know how she was going to make it, and she was seriously considering giving up the struggle. She was so tired of fighting from one day to the next ; always solving one problem after the other.

Her Mother took her into the kitchen, and she filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire on the stove. In the first pot she placed some carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the third she placed some ground coffee beans. 

When the pots came to a boil, about twenty minutes later the Mother turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what you see." The daughter replied to her that she saw carrots, eggs and coffee.

Her Mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots noting that they were soft, and next she asked her to take an egg and break it. When she did, she observed the hard boiled egg. Last, she took a sip of the brewed coffee and smiled as she tasted the rich aroma. The daughter asked her Mother what all of this meant.

Her Mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity; boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. But after being in boiling water for a time, it became soft and weak. The egg had been fragile, and after being in boiling water for a time it became hardened inside. Then she explained how the coffee beans were unique. Instead of the water changing them, They changed the water.

"Which are you?" asked the Mother of her daughter.

Which are you? When adversity knocks at your door do you respond as the carrot, the egg or the coffee beans? Strong at first but weakening under adversity like the carrot? How about the egg; going in with a hard shell with a malleable heart but allowing your insides to tighten up? Or, as the coffee beans did ; change the outcome of the very adversity that brought the pain?

Elevating oneself at the very hour of difficult circumstances can take us to a whole new level...which are you?

Let's Hear It For the Boys!

This is a special tribute to the Mother & Son relationships in our lives. We hear and talk about the bond between us and our daughters, but I don't think that our sons get enough publicity in the story-telling. Remember those chubby little babies who ensconced themselves in our hearts the moment we held them in our arms and smelt the essence of their tiny selves? And those very same infants started growing and when they were old enough to play outside they would capture and present to us with so much love and pride shining in their faces various bugs and other creepy crawlies as they exclaimed "Look Mommy! Look!". As time went merrily along, the bugs would be replaced by wildflower blossoms that were frequently mashed but meant no less because of the condition we received them in. The excitement of the giving never paled no matter what the nature of the gift!

Little girls may be sugar and spice and all things nice, but little boys grow up loving their mommies with a pure and unselfish love that makes us benefactors of unbridled adoration no one else can quite match. After all, haven't we ourselves heard the wise old goes like" how a man has loved his mother will affect how he loves his wife"? (or something close to that). We never stop feeling tender toward them even when they have grown into adulthood, have married and become a parent.

Our sons may be blessedly married to wonderful, caring, loving and nurturing women, and we know within our hearts they are well taken care of and life is good for them...but we were Mommies from the start and Mommies we will always be and that means even having relinquished them to a wife our hearts will forever be branded with the images of a toddler who ran into our arms for comfort and consolation, then a young boy who held our hand as we crossed the street, then a teenager who in his own way struggled to grow, and now a man complete with responsibilities and families of his own.

Every now and then it is a treat to simply spend time in their company and catch up on life events, chat about what's happening in his life right now, share a joke or two, or reminisce about family and friends. The bond will never be broken, and as life cycles do just that...cycle through, one thing is for certain...Mothers and Sons are forever! I especially enjoy chatting with my sons. God blessed me with two who are adults now with their own families and I must say with a certain degree of Motherly affection (okay...a little pat on my back too) that as a single Mother I didn't do half bad.

But wait...I must first explain that my husband and their father died when they were very young boys and I took over alone from there, but I do believe that because I was a young mother (my oldest is exactly 21 years my junior) and I hadn't a clue as to what raising boys would be like, the unorthodox methods I used were the very things that made us unique and helped us to love each other with the devotion we had and still have.

I have learned so much from them. Funny how the teacher becomes the student, right? And I think that comes from some ancient proverb also, but it is true. I love and appreciate the life lessons gleaned from their fresh perspectives on life and from their wisdom that baffled me from the beginning, but has become a comfort to me in these later years.

So, young Mothers, cherish these glorious childhood days and this irreplaceable precious time in your sons life. Know that the busy toddler, the hyperactive little tyke, the mischief-making young boy and the precocious teenager, will grow into a fine upstanding man who will one day become one of your best friends.

Thank God for little boys who become Great Men!