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Thursday, October 6, 2011

Mother to Grandmother...And Still a Woman

What every mother enjoys as she raises her family is the fact that she is needed. Needed and valued and family life just cannot function in it's fullest fullness without Mother. We start off involved in our children's lives with the unmatched joys of infancy; diaper changes, bottle washing, sleepless nights, you know the whole drill. These life events are permanently etched in every part of our brain, and they make up cherished memories and the memories multiply as each child reaches a milestone in their life. Before we know it, we were standing at the bus stop sending them off to elementary school and the next day we are in the audience at their high school graduation. Fast forward to college years, marriages, and births of the grandchildren and viola! you get to do it all over again. Here is the difference this time around...you are usually not the one in charge and your role is to mentor (parents first; remember the new parents who used to be your very own little kid?) and later on in life to the second generation child.

Now I know that the "so-called traditional role" of Grandmother has morphed into full-time substitute Mother in some families where Grandma is the only Mother some children have ever known. That is nothing new. And one major reason why we should not define "traditional" slots for us to fit in. The real grandmother role has been up front and center for ages. Some of us live in, some of us have the grands as members of our own household or we commute to babysit. Either way the scenarios change depending on the family dynamic and we provide whatever they need from us. That's what we are all about.

But, there is a flip side. Aside from being loving and nurtuing to the grandchildren and providing intricate support systems and functioning as cheerleaders for our own sons and daughters guess what? We exist as a separate entity. We are intelligent, intellectual, sensual, interesting, and independent of our families. We can balance our checkbooks, change the air filters in our homes, engage in enlightening conversation and hold our own in a political debate. In other words we are REAL. Romance, intrigue and love exists in our lives. These are some of the topics I will be discussing in my posts. Follow me and let's see what this is all about.

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